To succeed is to sacrifice...

After spending 10 wonderful days in California celebrating Christmas with my family I had a hard time leaving the amazing warm weather and heading back to Nashville! Although I didn't get a chance to see all the people I wanted, I did get to spend quality time with some of the people who I wanted to see most. It gets a little tricky when you want to get around southern california and you don't have a car!

This was my third trip home this year since living in Nashville. I can't believe it will be a year in January! It's funny, it seems that every time I go home I am asked the question, "so how long are you giving yourself to do this? do you have a time limit on how long you'll stay?" And the answer is no, I don't. When I moved here, the only plan I had was to become a professional musician. I wanted to try and make money at doing what I love to do. Lofty goal? maybe... but people do it every day.. why not me? I've only been here 1 year and I have achieved many of my goals already. I am, in fact, a professional musician! I get payed to play bass all the time! Yes, I still have a day job to pay the bills, but bass playing is definitely a big part of how I pay those bills. I have been on a tour bus, I have done a studio session, I am the permanent bass player for at least 2 artists here in town, I have played on Broadway (downtown nashville) and I honestly believe I am on track to making a living on bass playing alone. In this respect, I am already doing what I came to do... so if the question "how long?" is in regards to, how long are you gonna try this before you give up? well, i'm doing it.... so no need to give up! I did it, I'm here and I am a payed musician who gets gigs regularly. IF the question is in regards to "how long will you stay there as a bass player?" well, I have no idea. I guess when I feel it is time to move on to a new dream, I will! As for now, I feel good about the decision I made, and I think I've worked really hard to get where I am, and it can only get better from here!


When I first moved to Nashville, people would ask me.. "how is it?" and my thoughts then are the same now... it is a town that humbles you and inspires you all at the same time! I love that about this town! There are a million musicians that have been at it longer, know more about it, have more experience, and are just better than me! That humbles me every day! And yet, I am so inspired by that. They had to start somewhere too! They had their first studio session, their first 4 hour set in a honky tonk, their first road gig, their first rough gig, their first amazing gig, their first payed gig, their first WELL payed gig.. haha! Sometimes after a new gig, I will get advice from a drummer or the lead singer. They stick around and tell me a little more about how the town works, and how I can better prepare myself. It's hard to take sometimes, because that means they could tell I haven't been around long, apparently it looked like I needed the advice, but at the same time, I am so grateful for it! Instead of talking down to me, or just leaving me without imparting anything into me... Nashville musicians look out for each other. They like to help each other and when they see a newbie like me... they are eager to take me under their wing. Perhaps they see a little of themselves when they started out, or perhaps they just feel sorry for me... either way, I'll take all the advice I can get! After all, I had NO IDEA what it was going to be like when I came out here! Now... I even find myself giving advice to people who have just moved here....

People tell me a lot that they think it's great that I am trying to follow my dreams, some say they wish they could do the same. I just don't know any other way to live life? You are given a life, and it is your choice daily to live it how you want to. You are given talents, desires, characteristics, qualities, and all of these put together create endless possibilities for every person! What did God put in you? What is unique about you that you can share with others? You are different. And you have a purpose. When you pursue dreams, and desires in your heart, I believe it pleases God so much. He put those there! He wants that for us. He put such a huge passion for music in me, of course I need to pursue that! do it as long as I love it! That's not the only passion I have... so it's probably not the only thing I'll pursue in my life... that's what's so awesome about life! I can change my mind! I can switch it up! I can go from getting a degree in Communication, making videos, writing scripts, doing graphic design... to making music! And your interests and passions don't have to be your vocation or occupation... they don't always have to make you money for you to be following them and achieving them. I can honestly say that even though it has been really really hard to be here sometimes, leaving my family, making less than half the money I was making in CA, leaving friends.... I am happy! I have Joy because I am diving into what I feel I was created to do! It's not easy! but what about life ever is?? No, it's not easy, but it is rewarding and satisfying. And I am having a blast. Do I miss my family? more than they know, do I miss my friends? LIke the desert misses rain. Yes, I am sacrificing right now. A lot. But I get one shot at this life, and I want to experience all I can, all God has for me.

I'm moving into 2010 with more excitement than ever before. 2009 was definitely a turning point in my life. I have learned a lot about myself. I have made many new friends, I have cut ties with old ones. I have loved and lost. I have cried many tears, and I have laughed a lot. I have tried new things, been places for the first time. I have written songs, blogs, letters and checks! I have played bass in churches, bars, festivals, big stages, small stages, backyards, living rooms. I have cried on shoulders, I have offered my shoulder to cry on. I have changed. My life has changed. God still remains and I delight in the comfort of knowing that He loves me, that he's "got" me, and even more so in the comfort that nothing can separate me from His love.

Rock ON!
Love God. Love People.

Workin on it...

wow, it's been a while! It is not out of a lack of events that I have not written a blog in a while, but rather a lack of time to right about the events due to the frequency of them. huh? yah, anyway.

Well, it's October, and the leaves are changing colors. The temperature is dropping. The sun has gone into hiding for a while. It's a little dreary, but life is good!

Since I last wrote, I have picked up 2 more jobs. I have been the school age director at For Kids Only, and now I also work at American Eagle in the Opry Mills Mall, as well as serve at a small restaurant/sports grill 2 nights a week. The jobs are keeping me busy, but I have managed to still take bass gigs, rehearse and perform. Lately the gigs have been paying a bit more and it seems that every show I play, another opportunity presents itself. Which is great!!

Recently I played with Ben Sturgell at his album release show. We worked on the music for months and I think the show went really well!! We had a full band including brass, strings and even a clarinet solo! Hopefully the I will get my hands on the video soon and the live audio tracks. It was a lot of fun, and I was really proud of Ben and the band that night for such a great performance. I had a ton of fun!! Now that his album is out, he has been in several meetings with booking agents, publishers, and labels to get this project going. Hopefully we can book a tour soon and hit the road!

In the meantime, I have been playing with several different artists all over nashville and surrounding cities and states. Just last weekend I took a road trip to Monroe Ohio to play a gig with the Michael Gordon band. So much fun!

What I love about this business is that you are constantly meeting new people. And not just meeting them and moving on, but building friendships! Most of the time now, when i play a show, there is either someone I have already played with in the band, or when we show up to play, I know/have played with someone in the band before or after us. Small town! I finally feel like I am in the pool of hired musicians here in Nashville, and it feels pretty good.

Prior to Ben's album release show, I was suffering from carpal tunnel. It scared me because I know how bad it can get, and I also know that bass playing is a career choice for me, not a hobby, and I am going to need to keep my limbs healthy! I wore a brace for a while and took ibuprofen to keep the swelling down. It was annoying. Ben prayed for my wrist often, and I am thankful for that! My wrist is much much better now! Sometimes in long sets or rehearsals it will still tighten up a bit on me, but I am working on my technique to prevent this from happening.

All in all, I feel a bit settled in this town now. I can now get around town without getting lost EVERY time... I have friends... I have a church... I have jobs... things are going well! I still miss home very much. I miss my niece Riley like I've never missed anything before, and it makes me sad that I cannot be there to watch my nephew Ethan grow up. I am thankful for video chat! when it works... but it's just not the same. I can't wait for my sister to come out and visit next weekend!!! and then I will be home for 10 days around Christmas. So excited!!

You have been briefed.

Ben Sturgell Release Photos

Lake House Weekend!

There are a bunch of Birthdays among my friends here in Nashville that occur in May. For this reason, we all decided to celebrate them collectively at a lake house on Center Hill Lake. There were about 16 people who were up for it so we rented the house and set off for a fun filled weekend at the lake. Of course... cuz it's nashville.. it rained the ENTIRE time...

It's ok though! We still had fun! We spent... well... i spent... a lot of time in the hot tub outside.. even while it was raining! which was pretty awesome. We ate amazing food all weekend and watched movies and played tons of games. It turned out to be very relaxing and really really fun! There were a few of us that turned up with a rash when we got home.. i guess when that many people are in and out of a hot tub, you're supposed to add more chlorine... who knew?? gross! Here are some glimpses of our weekend at the lake. Luckly, it stopped raining just long enough for us to go down and skip some rocks.

First Professional Gig in Nashville

I am excited to share with you the experience of my first professional gig as a bass player here in Nashville. Although I have been playing for a couple different artists here and there, nothing had payed me any money, although all of it is good exposure and experience. Well I got a call during church one day, which I of course didn't answer. When I checked the message, it was a girl by the name of Erika Jo who was looking for a bass player to play a show in Arkansas that very next weekend. I called her back as soon as got her message. It had only been about 45 min since she called, but she said she had already found someone but that if it fell threw she would give me a call. BUMMER!! I felt like it had slipped through my fingers. In addition to me wanting to play a professional gig, I was really low on money, and needed something just to earn my rent. So ... I took it to prayer. And I told sarah to pray too, because she is God's favorite. I had almost given up on the thought... and I got a call on monday afternoon while i was at work. Apparently the other bass player couldn't make it to the rehearsals, so she called to offer it to me! Yes! The Lord came through once again! I told her I would absolutely do it, and i went after work and met her at a cracker barrel parking lot to pick up 2 cd's worth of music to learn for the show that weekend. She explained that the show was in Fordyce AK, we would be taking a tour bus to get there, food and beverage were taken care of, the show payed $300 and each rehearsal payed $25. I was sooo excited! but I tried to play it cool. haha!! when I got home is when it hit me... OMG... I have 26 songs to learn and memorize in 4 days!!! So I got to work... I stayed up late... drank red bulls... woke up early... putting hours of practice time in to chart and learn the music, and then get off the charts. I came to the first rehearsal pretty nervous. I got through it ok with my charts, and then went back to practicing... by the second rehearsal, I had everything pretty much nailed into place, and by the time rehearsal was over, I felt pretty confident! I didn't use any charts at the second rehearsal, and I did pretty good! I also started feeling more comfortable around the band mates, which was good, since we had quite a bit of time on a bus ahead of us. We Caravan'd to a kroger where we met and loaded the bus at around midnight on a friday night. We drove through the night, and I slept in my first tour bus bunk, hopefully the first of many! Erika Jo and I hit it off right away. I loved hanging out with her and she made me feel very welcome and comfortable. We played to set's, and apart from shorting the fuses a million times and dodging the rain... I think it went pretty well!!! then we got to eat some corn dogs and funnel cake. Can't beat that!!!! Erika and i plan to hang out and eat some sushi! although, being this far away from any ocean makes me a little nervous about sushi! Anyway, I did it. I played my first show and got payed, and met some really amazing musicians in the process. I hope it leads to more in the future!!

Show Time

So a lot of people wonder what I"m actually doing here in Nashville. Am I actually playing? Am i playing in a band? What kind of music? How do i get gigs? Well, I wanted to share a little taste of what my musical life is like out here! Tonight I finally got a perfromance on video. It's just one song, and we only did 3. It's what is called a writers round. It's when a bunch of writers come out and showcase their songs. Everyone does about three songs with an acoustic set and it's really fun! I played and Sang with Steve Virginia tonight. He is the artist I play with the most out here so far. In addition, I try to get gigs wherever and for whomever I can! I do this by meeting people who pass my name on, or knowing other bass players who may pass my name on or need me to cover a gig for them, and of course, Craigslist! So here is a video of Steve and me playing at a little place called the Edgehill Cafe, playing for a writers round put on by Jennifer Adan, who wrote Blake Shelton's latest "she wouldn't be gone"

I will Survive

On the days when I feel lonely, even in a room full of people, I will survive.
On the days when it's sunny and I want to wander to the beach with my sister or girlfriends, I will survive.
In the moments when I am lost, and home seems even further away than the moment before, I will survive.
When I am practicing my instrument and start to feel inadequate, I will survive.
When I check my bank account and there is, by no stretch of my imagination, enough in there to meet my obligations, I will survive.
When gigs require my time and energy but don't pay a dime, I will survive.
When the cupboards are bare and my tummy is growling, I will survive.
When the kids I take care of have nothing nice to say to me, I will survive.
When I feel like I am not good at my job, I will survive.
On the days when the weather is relentless and seems that it is out to harm me, I will survive.
When everyone and there mom wants my money, but no one wants to pay me any, I will survive.
When my favorite pair of jeans gets a whole in the knee, I will survive.
When trying to learn guitar makes my fingers bleed, i will survive.
When I book a gig and the tip jar is empty at the end of the night, I will survive.
When I play a gig and it does not go well, i will survive.
When I write a song that nobody likes but me, I will survive.
On the days when I can't get out of the house on time and seems I am rushing to EVERYTHING, I will survive.
On the days when the tour bus breaks down in the middle of the south, i will survive.
On the days when the paparazzi are in my face, I will survive.
When I can't decide which major country artist to sign with, Keith, Taylor, Carrie, or Rascal Flattts, I will survive.
When all the fashion magazines want to interview me and get my beauty secrets, I will survive.
When my hand starts cramping from signing autographs, I will survive.
When one of my song hits number one, and comes just shy of the record holder, I will survive.
When my dressing room has poor lighting, I will survive.
When I can't see the audience because of the bright lights on the stage I will survive.
When I can't decide which charity to donate millions of dollars to, I will survive.
When I fly my friends and family out to see me and cant help but smile on stage, knowing they are in the audience, proud as can be of me... I will survive.

Thank God for creating me to be a dreamer. Thank God for giving me the strength to endure all that comes with being a dreamer. Thank God for giving me a family and a network of friends who support my dreams. Thank God for the constant reminder that no matter what the situation, I am not in it alone, He is there, and I will survive.

Bunny's, Tornadoes and Ducks! OH MY!

The Easter Bunny finally made his way to Tennessee!! And with him he brought some of the worst storm weather and tornadoes I have ever seen in my life!! He definitely made an entrance! BUT! he didn't leave without leaving me a package!!!

Thank you so much Bob, Sally and Sarah! Your generosity knows no bounds! I love you all!!! THANK YOU!

In other news....
Today there was another severe tornado warning. Tornadoes touched down in a few surrounding areas killing 2 and injuring at least 35. The storms that blew through today were like nothing I have ever experienced. In some areas there was hail the size of baseballs. Rain poured down almost all day, thunder and lightning joined with a sky of dark clouds made for an exciting and scary day. Sirens sounded downtown at least 5 times today. It's scary, but God is good and my friends and I are all okay. This is tornado season, and we still have a few more months of it to go, with the peak months being May and June. At least it makes life a little more interesting!!

In other, other news...
Today is also good friday... and what made it an even better Friday was the Ducks clinching their spot in the playoffs this year! Way to battle boys! What a game against the STARS! they really needed this win, and they pulled it off in a sudden death shootout! Thanks to Getzlaf and Selanne being unreal!!!! and HILLER!!! IT"S HILLER TIME!

My First Tornado Warning

It happened today. A tornado in my area. It touched down a few miles away, and fortunately did not pass through my immediate neighborhood, but I will admit, I was scared. The weather was stormy most of the day. I was home by myself all day getting a kick out of the thunder and lightning going on. The rain was really pouring down! I asked a friend who lives a couple of towns away if she was gettin all this stormy weather too? she said it had passed her but that the news said a tornado had touched down in Davidson.Well... I live in Davidson County! So I got a little nervous! 

River worship

Here is yet another glimpse of why I love my new church The River. As a musician and a Christian, worship music has not only been a huge part of life as a musician, but of course in my relationship with God. Sometimes when I pray I feel that my words are not enough, that they cannot fully express my love for my savior. So, I burst into song. I sing my love for him, I sing of his amazing creation. Of his unfailing love. Of his unending grace. Sometimes even more than worshipping God with my own voice and hands raised, I am blessed by watching others. I could watch a body of believers worship all day and weep. It just blesses me. At the River, I experience God in a new way every time I show up. Being in Nashville, I expected that music would be awesome in all the churches, but I am truly blessed to have found this church. Donny and Reba McGuire are the pastors, and as if they weren't enough talent to make me excited, their daughter Destiny often leads worship and there are no words to describe this. She is amazing and if she were singing the phonebook, I would still sit and listen. She has a true heart for worship and a voice that could have only been given by the creator of the Universe. Here is just a little bit of a worship service. Below I showed you the dance team that also blesses my soul every sunday. I literally look forward to the dance every week! In this video clip, one member of the dance team dances during this song, (one of my favorite songs) and it just showed me how much talent is at this church and how ready they are to serve and worship God with these talents. Enjoy!

The River

Since living in Nashville, I have been attending an amazing church called the river. I just wanted to share with you a few glimpses of why I love this church so much!

Places that remind...

Okay, so being in a new place is always fun and exciting. But sometimes you just need some familiarity in life! I think that is just how we are wired as humans. When I went on my journey to Australia at the adventurous age of 23, my sister said to me,"take something with you that's familiar, that reminds you of home.. you will need it." I took with me my mickey mouse pillow case and my raggedy andy doll, tattered and warn and full of sentiment. Mickey Mouse pillow case? you ask with eyebrows raised and that judging tone in your voice. Yes. And here is why. Not only was there an annoyingly saturated disney theme in my room growing up, but it was a pillow case, where I layed my head to rest everynight in my stress free environment as a child. I brought it and it helped. Even though I was across the globe, when I layed my head down at night, I was reminded of home and a sense of security and peace. The raggedy Andy doll? Well, even prior to the annoying disney phase, my sister and I shared a bedroom in our old house in Norwalk ( it wasn't as ghetto when I was 5). There was an over saturated theme in that room as well. You guessed it, raggedy ann and andy, complete with red shag carpet to match their hair, sheets, curtains, and so much more. Well as a gift one year when we were much older, my sister bought me an original Andy doll from an antique store, and she bought herself Ann. Though it was not the same doll I grew up with, it had been loved just as much and it's almost better because my Andy has a bit of mystery to it. But I brought that with me more so because it just reminded me of my sister... probably the closest person to me... right up there with "the girls".

I say all this to say that living in Nashville has been awesome, as stated in the previous blog. I am just now getting to the point where I wouldn't mind a trip home... some familiar faces, places, smells, sights.... But there are things here in Nashville that remind me of people back home and it brings a smile to my face, and a bit of heartache because I would love to share these experiences with the people they remind me of. Maybe some of them I actually will!

Franklin, TN: a quaint little downtown area in a ritzy part of town. People among the likes of Keith Urban have been known to meander down this way and one of my favorite bands, Paramore happens to be from Franklin. I visited this place with my friend Naarah from the band Alabaster Box yesterday and I loved it! All I could think about was my bestie Sarah, who would have totally loved this place and would have had an awesome time there! The antique shops, clothing boutiques, and little mom and pop coffee shops, bakery's and stationery shops. A must for her when she comes to visit!

The predators game: I went to see my Ducks take on the Nashville Predators at the Sommet Center. If you know me, you know hockey has become a big part of my life... It made me miss Nate, and even Marcel and Ed a little bit because I spent so much of hockey season cheering along side these people.

Hillsboro Village: Alot like downtown Glendora, and therefore reminds me of "the girls" and out little outings there, and lunch at Village Eatery... from college all the way through to now with baby in tow!

The River: The church I am attending. An amazing church! Talented musicians and pastors who take me back to the days at my uncle's church that I don't know I miss until i get another little taste of it! This place is a place I would love for my whole family to experience. My sister especially would enjoy this! And Donny and Reba (rambo) McGuire are 2 people from back in the day that my mom knows and loves. She would love it there too!

Music Row: this little stretch of small suburban looking houses turned into music label offices and production studios always remids me of my brother who would love to explore and talk to people there.

If I could bring everyone out here for a visit I would. I love it here and would love to share in all these experiences with the people I love, but alas, that is the journey. Taking steps on your own and using what you've learned from past experiences and what people have imparted into your life to help guide you along the way. It's bitter sweet to be having so much fun here. I have made new friends, but there is something about being around the people who know you best. I am lucky to have suck amazing friends and family. They are supportive and encouraging and always there if and when I need them. Thanks all! and come visit!!!

Nashville.

Well folks, It's been a while.. but just don't think about it. I'm here now and that's all that matters. I've been in Nashville now for about a month and half... almost 2 months actually. Wow.. what a journey it has been! Since I have been here I have had a job and lost a job, dated a boy and dumped a boy, played some bass gigs, booked some gigs, turned down some gigs, met people, forgotten people.. and here I am. I love it here! Nashville is like a big city with a small town feel. Everytime I meet someone, I figure out that they have some connection to someone else I have already met. It's awesome. I played my first gig with Steve Virginia at 3rd and Lindsley... a pretty sweet little venue downtown. It was a great experience! Just this past weekend I played a gig with John Michael, a Christian artist... that was pretty sweet too! 

I've met so many people, I wouldn't be able to name them all, but some interesting ones have been the entire Lady Antebellum, who I've had the pleasure of hanging out with a few times, Carrie Underwood, I got to go bowling with her..kinda weird... and several others. Producers, managers, you name it.

I can honestly say that this was the best decision I could have ever made for myself. I am so happy here! I have made great friends, found an amazing church, and I'm pursuing my dream! I'm doing life the way I think it should be done... and let me tell you... there is Joy and freedom  in that! 

I do miss my family. I talk to my sister often.. not enough. We video chat and I can see her pregnant belly gettin bigger and bigger everytime! And bubba... goodness gracious! she's gettin so big, she is going to be an awesome big sister! She loves helping mom out, and she starts home school in the fall. She's so smart... I can't stand being away from her, but I will be home for a week in June!

I'm sure I will have much more to say in the coming months, but for now I just wanted to say, that I love it here and I'm having a great time. I talk Sarah's ear off everyday, I don't know what I would do if she didn't have verizon! Thanks for listening sarah!